Monday, 20 April 2009

Obsession: by Spyke

I was talking to my roommate from 2nd year of uni today. He is, and has always been, a very 'guy' guy - a bloke, if you happen to speak England English. He drinks a lot of beer and likes a lot of sport. He fails to complete the stereotype in that he was in a loving, monogamous relationship for the 3 years we were at uni, but still, you get the idea.

Now, the two main sports that he got very excited about were football and cricket. Over the course of the year his love of football rubbed off on me, the cricket did not. Speaking to him today, however, I informed him that I'd taken an interest in it now, having been invited to join a fantasy cricket league with other friends. His response surprised me for several reasons.

Firstly, I should explain that he and I are not close in the way that some guy friends are. We don't hug, we don't compliment each other apart from in exceptional circumstances, and we don't tell each other our problems and feelings. Since I do this with all my other guy friends, I'm going to put this down largely to his "blokeishness". Which is why I was surprised when he came out with his response, something that shows he's noticed something about me that none of my other friends have, that I never even noticed about myself. What he said was "And you've got an obsessive personality haven't you, so now you'll get obsessed with it."

And he's absolutely right. I cannot take an interest in anything without becoming obsessed with it. That football interest of his that rubbed off on me? Before I lived with him, I didn't give a fuck about football. Now I could probably name at least 300 of the 500+ players in the Premier League + a few more from the Italian and Spanish leagues, and tell you what clubs most of them used to play for. And it's not just football, it's any musician or TV show or anything that I've ever been interested in. I get obsessed with certain types of food - I ate peanut butter sandwiches every day for 12 years. I'm even now getting obsessed with the fucking idea that I am obsessive. When I told all this to one of my best friends, she responded: "Ironically [grr] it's a sign of high intelligence. It means that if you take an interest in your career, you'll be astounding at it. Look at all the successful people in the world, they're all obsessive. I always knew you had to be good at something but I never realised...this is it, isn't it?"

I forget what the point of this post was. It may have been how someone can know you so well without you realising, it may have been how stunned I am that I never noticed such a major aspect of my personality. But there it is. I am Obsessive, if hopefully not Compulsive.

Sunday, 19 April 2009

The Neverending Story

It's the end of a very dull Saturday night, so here comes some Sunday Stealing.

1. My uncle once :

Climbed several stories of scaffolding on a building in Hong Kong when my grandma wasn't watching. I did not inherit this gene.

2. Never in my life :

Have I shaved my head. Dunno why this popped into my mind. Maybe it's my greatest fear. I like my hair.

3. When I was seventeen :

I arrived at uni, younger than most of the other freshers and a month off the UK drinking age. They had to put my picture up behind the college bar.

4. High School was :

Fine, but not as fun as it could have been. I am now, strangely, close friends with two large groups of my ex-schoolmates who were only vague acquaintances at the time, and I wish I'd befriended them earlier.

5. I will never forget :

This could be a long list, I have a very good memory. But since I guess we're talking about when I'm old and stuff, I'll go with last summer's Far East adventure.

6. I once met :

A man with seven wives. As I was travelling to St Ive's.

7. There’s this girl I know who :

Sometimes appears to share a brain with me.

8. Once, at a bar :

I left my money with a friend and asked him to get me a double vodka Red Bull while I went to the bathroom. When I came back, I found out the Russian bartender had confused my friend's order of a pint of wine (classy, I know) and my order...and given us each a double vodka Red Bull, IN a pint of wine. I drank it, with some female encouragement. I don't remember much after that. Except for falling off a barstool, running into a tree, and laughing a lot. Hell, ask Tilli what happened, I also remember phoning her a few times.

9. By noon, I’m usually :


10. Last night :

I don't remember. Not because it was a wild drunken night, but because the last week has been so fucking dull that all the days have merged into each other.

11. If only I had :

A billion dollars. Yes, everyone says this, but there's a reason. It would solve almost all of my problems, and thus give me time to focus on fixing the ones that it wouldn't solve directly.

12. Next time I go to gym/church :

Will be tomorrow, in the case of the gym.

13. Susan Boyle :

Is very talented. I only found out about her this morning, delayed I know. Does no else find it harsh how everyone keeps pointing out, to her face, how surprising it is to hear that voice coming out of her? She's receiving a backhanded compliment from THE ENTIRE WORLD.

14. What worries me most :

Getting my head shaved, apparently.

15. When I turn my head left, I see :

I don't see nobody by my side.

16. When I turn my head right, I see :

Still nobody in sight. So I turn my head to the north, swallow that thing that they call pride, the old me's dead and gone...but the new me'll be alright.

17. You know I’m lying when :

You won't. I lie so infrequently that no one ever suspects.

18. What I miss most about the eighties :

Umm...nappies? Breastfeeding? No wait, that's not good at all.  Blissfull childlike wonder and ignorance, that'll do.

19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I’d be :

Ha. Um, let's go with Joseph Gordon-Levitt in 10 Things I Hate About You.

20. By this time next year :

I might have finished this meme. Halfway through, are you kidding me?! Right, I'm cutting down on the long answers.

21. A better name for me would be :


22. I have a hard time understanding :


23. If I ever go back to school, I’ll :

Drink a lot.

24. You know I like you if :

Again, you won't know, not for the first few times we meet cos I'll barely have spoken to you. After that point, if I am anything even approaching talkative, that's your sign.

25. If I ever won an award, the first person I’d thank would be :


26. When I compare 80’s rock to 90’s rock :

90's wins.

27. Take my advice, never :

Clean your glasses with aerosol deodorant. That was a motherfucker of a headache.

28. My ideal breakfast is :


29. A song I love, but do not own is :

Does this assume non-piracy?

30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest :

Fuck this.

31. My favorite Beatle is :


32. Why won’t people :


33. If you spend the night at my house :

Do not expect me to know where the pillows are kept. People found this out the hard way last week.

34. I’d stop my wedding for :

If I made it that far? Nothing.

35. The world could do without :

Piers Morgan. Yeah, you know who he is now America, if you know who Susan Boyle is. God he's an irritating fucker.

36. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than :

Lick the belly of a spider. But licking a cyanide capsule comes above both.

37. My favourite blonde is :

Huh. Difficult, I like brunettes. Ooh, got it, Elisha Cuthbert.

38: Paper clips are more useful than :


39. If I do anything well, it’s :

Mental arithmetic.

40. And by the way :

I tried to say I'd be there, waiting for...

Thursday, 16 April 2009

"Dawn's in trouble. Must be Thursday."

Yeah yeah, the original line is 'Tuesday', but you get the idea. Thursday Thunks!

1. Recently Berleen and I discovered the allure of the Twilight series. Have you ever been sucked in to the latest "thing"? (Like Harry Potter, the movie Titanic, social networking, etc. etc. etc.)

Often, yes. For instance, Harry Potter - definitely yes (although I was in the target age range when it first came out). Facebook - also massively yes, oh the hours I've wasted and will continue to waste. Lost - yes, until they found a statue of a foot with four toes on the island and I realised they were just going "hey, let's think of something mysterious that raises loads of questions and throw it in there, ridicule be damned." I neither know nor care what the hell happened after I stopped watching. Maybe they found evidence that they were in hell, or the past, or the future, or the nostril of a 100-foot space weasel. Who gives a fuck anymore.

Other times, emphatically not. Twilight being a case in point. Mind you, the hype was so huge that I was tempted, til I remembered I had testicles. Titanic I resisted seeing at the time, but saw it a couple years ago and my GOD I want those 3 hours back, even if I'm only gonna spend them on facebook.

2. What software do you use for your email?

Windows Mail. Huh, I don't really see what else I can do with this question. That's that then.

3. Are you comfortable being nude?

Not excessively. But then (cause or effect?), I really like clothes. Did I mention I had 100 t-shirts?

4. What is something you plan on doing this summer?

ROAD TRIP! Admittedly I cannot drive, but a few of my friends can. So what do I bring to the table, you ask. I respond: humour and a bunch of awesome mix CD's.

5. Do you have a favourite movie/book quote? If so, what is it?

Oh my god, what have you done. No, really. Do I have to pick one? How about, like, 57? That's a nice round number. You know, if you'd added TV to the options I'd literally be crying now. Fine, fine, I'll pick one, because I guess I do have one, even if it is 99.9% context. It's from Pulp Fiction, the moment when Bruce Willis is sitting in the car and Ving Rhames crosses the street in front of him, turns and sees him:


6. How many email addresses do you have?

Three. My official uni one, the hotmail one I use largely for MSN Messenger, and the hopefully untraceable one I use when signing up for websites/programs that are totally legal and don't involve piracy in any way.

7. Is the sky falling?

No, and such thinking will get you and your stupid bird friends eaten by an improbably named fox. However, Queens of the Stone Age said it is falling. So now I don't know what to think.

8. Have you been to the Grand Canyon?

Nope. I've barely even been to the US, just Miami for a couple weeks 7 years ago. I expected Will Smith to welcome me at the airport and invite me to a club where the heat was on. He didn't, but I bought some cool shoes.

9. When was the last time you mailed a hand written letter?

I honestly don't remember. I'm actually not sure I ever have, cos if I did it would have been when I was a kid, and who the hell do little kids send hand written letters to? Oh wait, of course. He must have received it as well, cos I totally got that Hot Wheels set.

Sunday, 12 April 2009

But it's not Thursday!

It is, however, a meme. Maybe one day soon I'll have the time and effort to make original posts as well. For now though, Sunday Stealing.

1. What is your current obsession?

I am by default obsessed with Tottenham Hotspur football club, at the moment I have no other overriding obsession so I'll stick with that.

2. What’s a good coffee place?

At uni we always favoured the Starbucks in Borders, so as globalised as you can get really. That's because they had books, magazines, and sofas we could fall asleep on on Sunday afternoons. But the small family-run places make the best hot chocolate.

3. Who was the last person that you hugged?

Ha, same person as last time I did this question, once again a couple days ago. Or another of my best friends, whoever left my house first, I don't remember.

4. Do you nap a lot?

Very very rarely, I tend to feel half dead when I wake up from naps. So only if I'm so tired that I already feel half dead anyway.

5. Tonight, what’s for dinner?


6. What was the last thing that you bought?

The Alien Quadrilogy DVD box set. For £8, I could not resist, I swear the damn thing was £80 when it came out.

7. What is your favorite weather?

Sunny enough that I can wear a t-shirt with no jacket, but not hot enough to sweat.

8. Tell us something about one blogger who you think will play this week?

Hmm, I've only done this like once before. Does Bud do this one? If so, he is sarcastic, funny and mildly perverted (in a good way).

9. If you were given a free house that was full furnished, where in the world would you like it to be?

Somewhere in Central London, maybe south of the river.

10. Name three things that you could not live without.

Friends, laptop, phone.

11. What would you like in your hands right now?

The answers to the exams I have in 10 days.

12. What’s one of your guilty pleasures?

Backstreet Boys and other 90's boyband music.

13. What would you change or eliminate about yourself?

I would like more self-confidence and the ability to grow a proper beard. I wonder if the two are correlated.

14. As a child, what type of career did you want?

I aspired to the lofty ambitions of road sweeper or supermarket checkout guy. I liked the uniforms.

15. What are you missing right now?

Friends, freedom, family.

16. What are you currently reading?

Sigh. An economics textbook.

17. What do you fear the most?

Spiders and dying alone.

18. What’s the best movie that you’ve seen recently?

This has been a slow couple of months for me movie-wise, I am eagerly anticipating seeing Wolverine, I Love You Man and Observe & Report in a couple of weeks after exams. Possibly all on the same day. To get back to the question, it wasn't really that recent but City of God.

19. What’s your favourite book from the past year?

Glass Books of the Dream Eaters.

20. Is there a comfort food from your childhood that you still enjoy?

Peanut butter. I feel this has been involved in a lot of my meme answers...

Thursday, 9 April 2009

That Thursday feeling.

Time for Thunking!

1. What was the last thing you ate?

That would be an oven-cooked beef burger from M&S. And of course, a little peanut butter from straight out of the jar, but we're ignoring that.

2. I say the color purple.. what do you think of?

Barney. Good god, how depressing, I never even watched the bastard.

3. Lamps or ceiling lights?

Ceiling lights. In my first year of uni I lived in a room that was awfully lit, because it lacked a ceiling light. The reason for this was to prevent students hanging themselves. True story. Well, not so much true story as urban legend, but there you go.

4. What colour rabbit is your favourite?

I don't even know what colours rabbits come in, so I'm going to say aquamarine.

5. Your car breaks down on a deserted road and your cell phone has no signal - what do you do?

Panic. I suppose eventually I would have to start jumping up and down and waving whenever I heard cars approaching. Or if it's THAT deserted, lock the car and walk til I had signal/found a payphone. I'd like to think I'd do that, but I have a feeling I might just curl up in the car and die.

6. What is one thing most of your friends do online that you just can't understand the fascination and do not participate in?

Well it's not most of my friends so much as one friend and half the damn world, but Twitter. Seriously, I'm slightly dorkish, I like fun computer stuff, but I just do not see the appeal at all, and it confuses me. Also I found out that the Seth Rogen and Christopher Walken accounts were both fake, which ruined my day.

7. What do you need right now?

Lots of things. Most imminently, judging by the rumbling, food.

8. And your most serious injury you've had was....?

Well, this is embarrassing. When I was about 11, I stubbed my toe so hard that I thought I broke it, although I almost certainly did not. Yeah, that's it, touch wood.

9. What is the most evil thing you've ever done?

Oh, probably some form of mental torture directed towards my little brother. Can't think of specifics.

10. Give us some random fact about you.

I own over 100 t-shirts. Apparently this is unusually for a 21 year old straight male.

Thursday, 2 April 2009

This seems to be the only part of my blog these days...

Hmm. Again, busy times. In about a month's time I think I'll have more to say. And hell, from around July onwards I'll have pretty much nothing else to do. Anyway, here we go with another Thursday Thunks.

1. Did you play any April Fools jokes on anyone or have a joke played on you?

Since I'm revising for exams and was left home alone by my jet-setting family this morning, I have not actually seen anyone today, making it hard to be pranked. Oh actually, the postman wrote my initial on a "missed parcel" slip instead of my dad's, thus causing me to get unnecessarily excited and waste half an hour going to the post office. If that was a joke, it was well-planned, since he left that slip yesterday. Bastard.

As for internet April Fools, I was constantly on the lookout, partially because the first thing that came up on my computer screen this morning was an MSN message sent to me by Tilli, which read "it's April Fools, BE ALERT." We have a history of being fooled. And no, didn't prank anyone else, couldn't be bothered...I like to fool people when they're NOT expecting it.

2. If you could be on any non-reality TV show as a guest star or star, which one would it be and why?

Arrested Development. This is because it is literally 100% pure comic genius, everything about it is perfect and for that reason I reckon even the extras must feel proud to have been involved in it.

3. Do you crack your knuckles?

I have done a couple of times in the past just to check if I could. Having ascertained that, I felt no need to continue, it's not particularly enjoyable.

4. If you remember your first day of kindergarten, were you scared or excited? If you have kids or grandkids, were they scared or excited?

I don't know if scared is the right word, but I was very, very upset. I was incredibly attached to my parents and really did not like strangers or other children, so it was a pretty horrific scenario for me. Apparently I just screamed until one of the helpers had to take me outside, where I calmed down and showed her all the different car models I knew as they drove by.

5. If you are in the shower, hear the fire alarm going off and smell smoke/see flames, will you just run out of the house with a towel on or grab some clothes & dress as you run out?

Depends on the relative positions of shower, fire and clothes. I'd like to put on at least a t-shirt, but I ain't gonna run back into the flames to do so. I would also like to make sure my hair looks good. You never know who'll be outside.

6. Last week the Thursday Thunkers asked about your Daddy (twice), so this week tell us a little about your Mom.

She's very tough, very proud, extremely loud, and fiercely protective of me. Not long ago my closest female friend and I realised that she also has every single one of these attributes. We decided this probably wasn't a coincidence.

7. Which search engine do you use most often?

Google. Not very exciting, but it's the best. There's a reason every piece of software Google brings out completely kicks ass.

8. Did you participate in Earth Hour?

I don't know what this is. I was on the phone to one of my friends earlier and he was saying how his boss at the office had been talking about it. However by this point we'd been on the phone for around half an hour and I'd started playing with a yo-yo I found on my desk, so I don't remember what he said.

9. What was the last new-to-you movie you watched? Was it in the theater or on DVD? Was it good?

Watchmen, in the cinema. Was it good? I think I'm less able to give an answer for this than I ever have been for any film. I think I'll just say, "read the comic".

10. If you do something embarrassing, do you laugh it off, or sit & worry about it?

If I'm able to see how people react to it, I will generally laugh it off. If not, depending on the situation, I will sometimes sit and worry. Specifically, about how embarrassing it actually was, how it's going to affect my life, and whether it's at all salvageable. It usually is.

11. Where is your favorite spot in your home to sit & relax?

Probably lying on my bed. Or lying on a sofa. Lying down is good. I was once discussing school reports with my headmaster, and one of them described me as "laid-back". He asked if I felt this was accurate, and pointed out that even as I sat there I was practically horizontal.